年轻的普遍特征——急于摆脱现状

A Common Trait of Youth: Eager to Escape the Present

> By Li Xiaolai · 2009-07-07 · [Original (web archive)](https://web.archive.org/web/20111002214116/http://www.lixiaolai.com/archives/7001.html) (Chinese)
> Our translation from the Chinese original.

Two years ago, I wrote a post called "[The Life Satisfaction Curve](http://www.lixiaolai.com/archives/46.html)" (人生满意度曲线):

> According to the survey findings of Dartmouth College economics professor [David G. Blanchflower](http://www.dartmouth.edu/~blnchflr/), under normal circumstances the degree of satisfaction a person experiences over a lifetime, distributed across the age brackets, can be joined into a U-shaped curve.
>
> [[image]](http://www.lixiaolai.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/03/patternofhappinessthroughoutoflife.PNG "patternofhappinessthroughoutoflife.PNG")
>
> This isn't entirely the same as what I had always felt. I used to think it should be an "S"-shaped curve lying on its side, with highs and lows, often cycling back and forth. But when I saw this chart, I suddenly realized that in the past I could only feel my own feelings—which are of course extremely limited—whereas Professor Blanchflower's conclusion is based on the results of a macro-level survey.
>
> Starting at around age 15, satisfaction begins to decline steadily. This is probably caused by no longer being ignorant and fearless. One slowly realizes that one is insignificant and negligible in this world; one suffers all day long between so-called ideals and a distorted reality.
>
> Only at around age 45 does the curve start to rise. A long thirty years. With an ordinary person's mind, observing, feeling, understanding, pondering, practicing, reflecting, until suddenly seeing the light or going astray, takes thirty years.
>
> Staring at this chart, I wonder whether some people can, through thinking and will, speed up the growth of their minds, to the point of turning their life satisfaction curve into another shape?—though still a U shape. Shorten those thirty years somewhat, say, to fifteen or even only ten years?
>
> [[image]](http://www.lixiaolai.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/03/wishfulpattern.PNG "wishfulpattern.PNG")

Some ideas need time to ferment. The beginning written two years ago only gets its ending today.

Looking back, I have long since come all the way through it myself. And in recent years, through all kinds of luck and circumstance, I've had the opportunity to talk with many exceptionally outstanding young people—every year I come into contact with large numbers of outstanding students, then send the great majority of them to study at top international schools, and then can observe their transformation and growth at every moment. Not everyone has this kind of opportunity. When you've seen a lot, it's easy to figure things out.

[When people are young they easily become restless](http://www.lixiaolai.com/archives/95.html "Why are you restless"); this isn't their fault—the only thing to blame is the ever-growing pressure of the environment. The high-speed flow of information means that everyone has more opportunities to see more people who are more outstanding than themselves, and no one can stop the [almost instinctive comparison](http://www.lixiaolai.com/archives/441.html). This comparison is pressure, pressure from the environment.

People often underestimate the enormous power of the environment (in our culture, children are taught from an early age that "external causes work through internal causes……"—a completely bullshit line that covers the head and leaves the ass bare [Translator's note: 顾头不顾腚的屁话, literally "fart-talk that minds the head but not the butt," i.e. half-baked nonsense]). The fundamental reason may be that *people often take the influence of the environment for their own heartfelt ideas*. For example, many students now say they are interested in "business"—believe me, they really do think so "from the heart." But is this really entirely their own idea? Very likely not. In our country, open any newspaper, and the figures appearing on the front page are basically all "political leaders"; these kids know by intuition alone that their future has nothing whatsoever to do with them. Then look at the figures on the second page: basically all "entertainment stars"; these kids likewise know by intuition alone that their future has nothing whatsoever to do with them. Look further on, and what they see are "business celebrities"—these kids finally see a future that may be feasible for them…… And so an idea "pops" out: "I'm going into business……"

Pointless comparison with the outside world makes everyone acquire, "out of thin air," an extra goal that doesn't belong to them at all. And so, at every turn, the situation of [being kidnapped by one's own ideals](http://www.lixiaolai.com/archives/6645.html) arises. The more dissatisfied one is with the status quo, the stronger the desire to escape it, and this desire will eventually make a person lose their way. Because no matter who you are, in essence no one can "escape the status quo," because the status quo at every moment is the result of some past moment or moments, and the status quo at every moment is the cause of any future moment—no one can escape the bonds of reality.

What is the essence of life? Nothing more than "whatever you want, you won't be given." And what is the wisdom of life? It is "[whatever you're given, make good use of it](http://www.lixiaolai.com/archives/5966.html "What matters is what you have, not what you want")." In a certain sense, sayings like "adversity breeds success, hardship makes people mature" are pure nonsense—more likely they are [Translator's note: the original writes 更可是, literally "more can-be"; 更可能是 ("more likely are") is meant; translated by the intended sense] nothing but the masturbatory fantasies [Translator's note: 意淫, literally "lust of the mind," i.e. self-indulgent fantasizing] of failures guessing at success, which they never had a chance to experience in their whole lives, and at the successful. Failures will never have a chance to learn the truth about success, because people are most easily [limited by their own experience](http://www.lixiaolai.com/archives/435.html "Escaping the limits of experience"), and people who have never had even a little experience of success have even less way to escape their own limits.

Being dissatisfied with the status quo and eager to escape it is often the trap ordinary people most often fall into without noticing—although occasionally it is also the real driving force of a few. Accepting the status quo is the optimal strategy: do what there is to do, use what there is to use; whatever you do, do it well; whatever you use, use it well. Don't often feel that things are bitter (that way you can't help gazing at yourself in the mirror in self-pity, wasting energy and time); instead, find a way to find delight in any situation—[happiness is a skill](http://www.lixiaolai.com/archives/109.html). Almost all the outstanding young people I've met over these years have one trait: they have the least dissatisfaction with the status quo (perhaps their excellence makes it harder for them to be dissatisfied?), they love their lives, they are [relatively less concerned with outside influence](http://www.lixiaolai.com/archives/1994.html "How are they so cool?"), they focus more on doing things without distraction, and of course they get more outstanding at every moment.

Copyright: © LookMinds. Our own edited text and translation, not a substitute for the original; rights in the original belong to the author and the platform. Please see the original link.